Ash's Life Lessons

Stumbled across this in my boredom a few weeks ago. I actually compiled this list when I was 16, still in high school, and thought it was the perfect insight to my weird and wonderful world. Also not really a comfort to know I haven't changed. At all.

(WARNING: Narcissism ahead. Wear protective gear).

Lesson One: Power is an inescapable part of all human interactions. Either you have it, or your opponent does.
Lesson Two: Life isn't fair.
Lesson Three: Every circumstance offers us a choice.
Lesson Four: I am a depraved bitch, get used to it.
Lesson Five: Retaliation is well and good, but one is better off revealing ahead of time the horrors people will face if they divulge a confidence.
Lesson Six: Never assume anything.
Lesson Seven: Continued nagging will get you nowhere.
Lesson Eight: Listen to what is not said as carefully as to what is.
Lesson Nine: The former is usually more correct than the latter; trust your instincts.
Lesson Ten: Always look below the surface.
Lesson Eleven: Few are clever enough to know when they are being dense, but even fewer know in what way or why.
Lesson Twelve: You would do better to be slightly naïve.
Lesson Thirteen: Say what you mean, mean what you say.
Lesson Fourteen: Once in a long while, what's right is wrong and what's wrong is right.
Lesson Fifteen: There is a fine line between likeing a challenge and being compulsive.
Lesson Sixteen: One should not attempt to bite a snake.
Lesson Seventeen: Take advantage of a situation whenever possible, despite the consequences.
Lesson Eighteen: It is always smarter to align yourself with a more powerful person.
Lesson Nineteen: Don't try my demonstrably limited patience.
Lesson Twenty: Always hear an opponent out. He may give you ammunition by accident.
Lesson Twenty-One: It is impossible to reason with an irrational thinker.
Lesson Twenty-Two: It is much safer to be feared than loved.

xXx

(A/N: Lesson Twenty-Two was lifted right out of Machiavelli's "The Prince")
(A/N: Also have Deeble to thank)